911 cheat sheet

In some random TV show I happened to catch a glimpse of, there was a woman calling 911. She was huffing, puffing, yelling, cursing and sobbing on the call to 911. Not many people mastered the art of calling 911 like she did. For those people who don’t know what to do after calling 911, here are some tips:

1. Speak as fast as you can. After all you want get the message across quickly.
2. Punctuate your account with abundant "Ohmigod"s for the dramatic effect.
3. Remind them multiple times, "Come quickly. Come quickly." Unless you tell them, how would they know it's an emergency?
4. If the operator doesn’t panic even after the above, telling her, “It’s an emergency, bitch!!” might jolt her into action
5. If it is a medical emergency, don't play the broken phone.Put the patient on the phone directly
6. Don't forget to start with an opening joke like, "A large pizza for delivery please he he he"
7. If the operator sounds like a cute girl, don't hesitate to flirt with her.They appreciate some fun and these 911 chicks are HOT.
8. When signing your house lease or when calling 911, it is important to understand the reason for each question.So for every question the operator asks, take time to ask "Why do you want that information?"
9. The operator might be very impressed and hence help quicker if you use the police jargon you heard in the movies, you know, "We have a 433 here. Dispatch 122 ASAP"
10. Call back every 90 seconds to make sure help is on the way

Please do take time to check out these real 911 tips: Link and Link